Bipolar or something like it...

A former S.L.C. Punk, baptised and converted to a N.Y.C. Punk.

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

So....

Dear Jerkface,
Long time no talk. Yeah, I know, I suck. Anyway, just wanted to update you on the latest
-4th of July was rather uneventful. You know, the usual...drink beer and watch shitty fireworks
-The album is coming along very nicely, and a small label has shown some interest. We'll see.
-My rent is going up 13%. Fuck New York Real Estate.
-I am now officially addicted to nicotine...fuck!
-I'm going home tomorrow to sit on a boat and roast my white ass skin in the sun, fuck yeah.

Friday, June 23, 2006

DOES THE DRESS CODE PERMIT SUNGLASSES?


Dear Jerkface,
You know when you're in a really uncomfortable social setting, such as a company party, so you drink to try to ease some of that awkward discomfort, and then you drink more, because you still feel strange, and then all of the sudden is 2:30 in the morning and you are dancing with some Indian guy who has greased back hair, and then you end up hanging out with the nerdy summer associate outside, smoking incessantly because you're drunk as hell, and then all the sudden you wake up and it's time to go to work, and you're still drunk, but it's not a good drunk, it's the kind that makes the room spin, and standing upright in the shower a difficult feat, and then you get to work, and you find yourself grooving to the sound of some guys shitty R&B music blasting from his earphones on the elevator, and then you're sitting at your desk and you want to end it all because you realize that you're so hungover and you still have 9 hours of work ahead of you....yep, it's pretty sweet.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

WHAT'S YOUR HANDICAP?


Dear Jerkface,
Tonight I have the honor of attending a work party for our outgoing interns. Yippy Skippy! I cannot wait. The excitement is overwhelming. I can see it right now. I will attempt to converse with multiple socially inept bankers. Conversation going something like this;

Krissi "Have any fun plans for the weekend?"

Banker "Yeah, going to go play 18 holes up at the Hampton Hills Golf & Country Club"

Krissi "Oh, sounds like fun"

Banker "Yep"

Krissi "Yeah"

Banker "......"

Krissi " So...."

Oh, geez, ! I love these things. Free drinks and douche bags galore.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Ah, summer...


Dear Jerkface,

I just love summer in the

city!

Friday, June 16, 2006

PREACHER'S DAUGHTER


Dear Jerkface,
Growing up as a preachers daughter was always an interesting thing. I knew that it had an affect on my behavior back then, but I have now come to the realization and understanding that it has, and probably will continue effect the way I function in everyday life. Back then, my natural tendency was to rebel against any form of authority, I find that although I am no longer under the rule of my father, I still thrive off the feeling I get when I am breaking rules. For instance,

- As I struggle to fall asleep at night, it helps to imagine myself under my desk, or face down on my keyboard, risking my job and livelihood to catch a few Z's. Yes, I know this is beyond effed up, but hey, what are you gonna do?

- I don't really like to smoke, but on the weekend, I do, because I know I am risking my health, and pissing my friends off who hate to smell like smoke....tee hee hee.

- Although I know it is hell on my liver, and the risk of ending up kissing some assbag dude is great, I enjoy getting drunk off my ass every now and then, simply because it is stupid and unnecessary.

- My favorite type of sex is when there is a risk involved...like staying in the same hotel room as your friends and trying to get away with some freaky freaky without them hearing. Hmmm, come to think about it, dirty sex is even better because it involves doing things that would not be thought of as proper or right by the standards of my upbringing. Come to think of it, any and all sex is great, because doing it outside the bonds of marriage... no way....not allowed people!

In summary, once a rebel always a rebel, and I'm cool.
* Pictures may be disturbing, they are a joke people.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

HAPPY FLAG DAY


Dear Jerkface,
You know what today is? Yep, that's right, it's Flag Day. Woohoo! In honor of my home state flag, I have decided to behave in a way that would make the founding fathers of Utah proud. I'll forego coffee, cigarettes, sex, alcohol, cursing, and maybe I'll even take me a couple of husbands....

...On the other hand, maybe I'll just honor the American flag, and cherish the freedom of being free to do whatever the hell I want. You know the motto, "I don't care, feels good."

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

GOLDEN


Dear Jerkface,
I think that they should make sleeping a competitive sport. If they did, I would be the Michael Jordon of it.